The Mutant Archive

 Previous versions, lyrics, and commentaries.   Click on the song title for an audio miss of very close bliss.   The lyrics for the songs (for the next two releases) are below.  Go there to translate the gibberish.

Earlier versions.  Download if your are super crazy bored.
Voyeur	we all like to stare don't we?  written as a birthday gift for a friend, Tony.
Control	putting up with something for just so long, then putting it where the sun don't shine.
Bitter	is it easier to say "shut up and get out," to close the door and leave friends behind?
Locomotive	when your relationship is tied to the train tracks and she's driving the train.
Mesmerize Me	boy meets girl and then... blah blah blah.
Conspire	is anyone's point of view correct anymore?
Chapter 3	conflicted emotions when Christian ideals meet  the physical world
Reflection	don't you just hate seeing some qualities in others only to find your looking at a piece of yourself

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Proof we enjoy pain ... We have no shame versions ... Liar (an early conspire) Falling Falling (an early reflection) Locomotive Voyeur Liar Chapter 3 Pieces Velcro (became Control) Untitled Bitter Bitter   Velcro

 

You say I'm a voyeur but isn't everyone?

staring at you like the sun

this lusting for strangers; will it ever stop? 

why do they seem so far?

 

I cant stop this looking or incessant staring

when will I stop this line of reasoning?

don't have the courage and lack the nerve

nor the willpower to look away from her (to say hello to her)

 

seems to me, I'm not one you'd notice

your eyes wander around my space

buy I'm hypnotized by you dancing there

transfixed to your sacred place

 

aren't we all voyeurs the whole world over?

staring down the ones we want

from our car or an internet bazaar

we're all looking for that spark

she called me earlier today,

to say she missed me in every way

I said, I miss you too, 

but can't you see that we're through

good and bad, I'd weigh it out...

but my scales broke from our last bought

hearing now you want me back

comes off more like a full attack

 

attack

    you're the knife drawn to my back

attack

    you're the bomb nestled in my lap

 

take these feelings you control

and bury them in a deep dark hole

you consume my day and night

don't tell me you'll help me survive these times

so many things I'm attracted to

all those things that make up you

but your the bomb ticking off in my lap

your affection is an attack

 

all the times I wanted to say

I just wish you could stay

listen to me before I go insane

because you're a plague that's on my brain

what are you trying to hide?

its something you keep so far inside

am I to blame that you hold the pain?

what is it you could hope to gain?

death is final but our love was not

I came to tell you but I forgot

does it hurt, or make me bad?

you can relate, I've seen your dad

 

fly through the clouds in your head

embrace the dreams in your bed

control yourself until the end... and start again

 

what is it I'm trying to hide

that I keep so far inside

am I afraid to be smothered

and then rejected by my mother

is this sane or am I deranged?

am I normal naked on this stage?

feeling anxious for defeat

knowing life can't be beat

 

I'll fly through the voice in my head

and fight the disease in my bed

open my mouth and taste the rain... and start again

 

sometimes life is really rough

and your best is not enough

don't waste your time on other's dreams

they are never what they appear to be

a summer sweat is a dripping pain

as the sun scorches what a dead man could bring

a ruined city in the name of god

all that's bitter embraces us all

 

fly through the void in your head

embrace the dreams that rest in your bed

open your mouth and taste the rain

swallow your failure and start again

before my choice is made a 1000 feelings merge

despite my failures somehow I'll survive 

on this day judgment won't deliver me to the abyss that lies below

to find you waiting there for me

 

I feel fear as your eyes explain

you no longer hold in me that special gaze

I tried so hard as you sacrificed... nothing

with the speed of a bullet train I barrel to my death each day

 

darkness on one side as light fades through the other

there's a thin line that I walk, I can never fall to either

as you live life you just fly by, but my feet must provide

a locomotive passes by each day, reminds me of the games we played

 

what happened in my that made your despise me

I thought I was nothing less than perfection

now I bear the blame, my soul the cost for you

I'd ask for forgiveness but your faith answers

looking in your eyes turmoil shows

they're a mirror I see trough my disguise

an image stares back at me, your ghost is lashing

does this haunt you, I find it so tempting

 

falling down I kiss the ground

that you walk on in your idle depression

if I could be, I'd be there now

crawling through your cold recession

 

will you know within your lifeline

or will you grovel and ask of the blind?

viewing everything I still don't see

what's in front of my eyes

 

you're vision never got better

living life in 5 dimensions

and frost never killed the plague

or washed out your intentions

drugs, money, and sex are power

but they're not enough, I told you so

 

 

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